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Are You Searching For Something?


I met an old friend yesterday. We might only see each other once or twice a year but there is never a pause in our conversation. We pick it up where we last left it, even if a year has passed.

My friend asked me about my Circle work, she was interested and had a lot of questions. She asked if you have to have something 'big' going on in your life to attend a Circle. I told her that you didn’t. I explained that sharing your joy is just as important as sharing your sorrow. It's all welcome. I talked about how it feels to be in Circle, how it’s so different to social spaces, how you pass over a threshold to a different space, a scared space and then she made a connection.

She shared a recent experience with me. It was an unexpected experience that brought her a comfort she didn’t know she needed and a sense of belonging she now knows she can’t do without.

She didn’t know that she was searching for something until that something presented itself.

I shared my experience of finding Circles, I’d stumbled upon them by chance and by doing so, the search was over and I had arrived.

I've been thinking about our conversation a lot. It’s a very human paradox. We don’t know what we don’t know but maybe, our bodies know; our old brain, our nervous system, I think they remember.

Human beings are hard-wired to seek out meaningful connection. It doesn’t have to be community necessarily, it has to be connection. Our ancestors gathered together in a million different ways. They used song, dance and story telling. They performed rituals to mark rites of passage and the turning of the seasons. They gathered together to be as one.

Here we are in the modern world with the seemingly limitless offer of virtual connection. We have families and communities but if we're honest with ourselves there’s something missing. Our old brain knows it. Our nervous systems know it.

So maybe the question shouldn’t be are we searching for something, the question should be what are we missing? Do we meet with others to be as one. Do we sing or dance, or tell stories. Do we have a place in our lives where we experience interconnectedness, where we tend to our spirit and witness others tend to theirs?

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